I AM AN INNIE-OUTTIEvert
Here’s the scene: I’m sitting on a table for one, well, it could be a table for four but it’s just me, so it’s just One. My fingers gently hold the crystal clear flared shot glass filled to the brim with chilled Emergen-C with Vitamin D (citrus flavor) so yeah, I like it strong to combat those nasty free-radicals. I no longer sip on Jack Daniels or Barcadi rum anymore but at least I still have an imagination to pretend.
They say, as we get older, we regress to our younger years. I guess, I don’t mind play’in youthfulness again.
This morning’s thought is about personality changes as we get older.
Nowadays, it seems I seem to lean toward being more introverted, while other times I seem to be more extroverted. A lot of times the shift depends on who I am with.
I thought perhaps, this was due to being single and retired, and then I thought perhaps it was all due to the aging process. Then again, perhaps it has to do with all these things of just being human in this day and dealing in contemporary times.
But I’ll also mix thoughts about aging and time, and which has nothing else to do with being an Innie-Outtievert but it’s on my mind so I’ll just drift in and out.
I just want you to know, it’s deliberate and not senility.
- the condition of being senile.”the onset of senility”synonyms: decrepitude, infirmity, feebleness, unsteadiness, senescence, decline, old age, dotage, second childhood, confusion, Alzheimer’s (disease), senile dementia;
As a teenager, I used to read the daily astrological forecast in the newspaper. I would anxiously seek daily confirmation of what my day would be like and how I should react to these daily events.
While reading, I wondered daily: Who Am I?’ Do i really have traits of a Greek Capricorn, or do I have traits of a Chinese Dragon, am I an introvert, or am I an extrovert?
As I get older, I’ve noticed I’m neither an introvert nor an extrovert. Instead, I think I am as confused now as i was when I was younger, but most definitely I am more accepting of who I am even though I get anxiety when asked: What astrological sign are you?
Uhhh, is there such as thing as an astrological borderline bipolar personality?
Let me take another shot of Emergen-C.
At this very moment, I’m a self-professed “Innie-Outtievert”. When it comes to my personality, I am good with being indecisively, situation-ally both introvertie and extrovertie. And once the effects of the vitamins, antioxidants and electrolytes wear off, who knows, astrologically I may just be what i was last week Monday and what I will be next week Friday.
I don’t consider myself “old” although I make excuses that I’m merely older. Deep inside, I am still capable of being the entire spectrum of a rainbow through misty rain and iridescent sun rays of the sun.
Still just recently, say for the past 3-decades or so, I have been paying more attention to myself by looking in the mirror of avoidance in a desperate futile attempt to disprove the physical reality of aging.
It’s funny. Nowadays, in the mirror, my reflection doesn’t say, “Man! You look great!”
Instead my reflection says, “You look like when I remember that time when you were in youthful love.”
My reflection says, “It’s not about looks, but it’s all about your state of emotions. Stay in touch with your emotions.”
Age marks are like the young lady next door who is kindly polite to me just because she’s her naturally friendly, courteous self bringing sunshine into other people’s lives. Makes sense considering she’s probably in her youthful twenties or early 30’s. I remember being that too!
Age marks like youth, is a reminder of once upon a time ago, and present time transitioning onward. We are what we are. Time is what it is.
So it’s 6:45 am Sunday and I feel awake for a change. Never mind that I’ve probably slept for 12-hours give or take 12-hours, because I sort of remember dozing, but don’t really remember what time I really slept.
To avoid being pinned for being forgetful aka “senior moments”, I just tell myself, no worries, don’t be tied to the clock. It’s another morning and in twelve hours, it’ll be another night.
Since we’re talking not being tied to the clock, maybe seniors ought to re-frame their concept of time and base time on seasons instead?
“Hey what time is it? It’s Spring of course!!”
You realize, dogs don’t wear paw-watches. They get up when you get up. They sleep when you sleep. They actually never seem to sleep but according to studies, dogs sleep a lot more than you think they do.
In fact, dogs sleep when you’re not really paying attention to them, such as when you can’t because you’re at work, or busy with your life.
That’s why if you were a dog, with lots of sleep quota you’ll always greet your significant other in a jump happy sort of way! Globs of unconditional love with bright eyes and happy smile! Miraculously, 24/7. Your significant other would be sooooo happy! And if your significant other did the same, so would you!
As we end this morning’s thoughts, may I wish you lots of sleep everyday, be happy as a dog, accept those little age marks, just be your happiest self so you and others may enjoy happier days.
I have an Innie-Outtievert day!